Intamacy Kit.

Everybody loves Tara: Episode 2

Tara and I are at a great room in the Venetian. Two TV’s and a really clean tub, that in spite of the tub’s physical purity, I just didn’t trust it’s history… besides baths, as a boy,  present some really strange logistical situations that I prefer to avoid altogether.

It was a special occasion and my boss invited us to celebrate the day. So, the room was on the company. It was awesome to travel with my wife.

Next to the TV was a tray of snacks. Pink boxes with windows. Tara thought they were cute. She was NOT aware that they were resting on a scale that itemizes and charges when each time an item is removed. She picked up the gummy bears, cha ching. Salted Almonds, cha ching. Yogurt pretzels, cha ching.

There was also a roundish container. She picked it up. Cha ching. She read it. Intimacy kit. INTIMACY KIT. Complete with implements that would probably make a stripper  blush.

“Ewww”, she wiped her hand on her jeans and put it down quickly. Even though the “kit” was boxed and wrapped in plastic and might as well have been Almond Roca.

Later that night we bumped into a colleague in the hall.

“Oh yeah,” he said. “Make sure not to mess with the plate of goodies. It’s a trap. You’re charged right when you pick it up.”

Tara grabbed him by the shirt.

“Shut Up! They can see everything that was moved?”

“Well, yeah.”

Needless to say, she pounced on everyone who could possibly reverse the charges, assuring them that we would “NEVER” open that container.

Hmm. Never? Really?

One thought on “Intamacy Kit.

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